How to turn your dreams into reality
Dreams are not just goals; they are the vivid, emotional visions that ignite your spirit and get you excited about life. They should evoke feelings of hope, joy, pleasure, or excitement. To help you connect with these powerful emotions, let’s embark on an exercise I call “The 10 Feels.”
For this exercise, taken from my book, Breaking Free, you’re going to write down 10 dreams that fill you with positive feelings. These dreams should be vivid and detailed, painting a picture of the life you want to live. To make this process even more meaningful, let’s imagine what would make you proud and fulfilled when looking back on your life.
But let’s get morbid for a moment. Picture yourself lying on your deathbed (hopefully at a ripe old age after a life well-lived) and think of 10 things that you could look back on over your life and think, “Wow, I really knew how to live, laugh, and love.” What would those 10 things be that would make you feel proud?
Now, write these 10 things down. Don’t worry about the timeline or the how. Drop the guilt and don’t worry about what others might think. Just write from the heart.
But, before you get started, here are two important tips:
- Write about your 10 Feels as if they were a done deal (i.e., write them in the present tense).
- Paint a picture with your words – describe the dream in detail so you can really picture and feel each item (i.e., google some fun, expressive adjectives).
Here are some thought-starters to get you going:
- Relationships: What do you want in your life relationship-wise? If you’re in one now, how do you want it to be and feel in the future? If you’re not in one, what would an ideal one look like? What traits are important to you?
- Career: What could your career look like? Don’t get bogged down in titles or industry but rather the types of activities you do. What’s the culture of your work like? Your colleagues? Where do you work? What ignites your passion?
- Activities: What activities do you picture being important in your life? Perhaps you have a hobby that brings you joy? In my case it’s “We travel the world and see awe-inspiring sights.”
- Living: Where do you live? Do you have a vacation home? What does the setting look like?
- Finances: What’s important to you about money? Do you picture making a certain amount? Write it down. If you’re being conservative, add a zero to it! Do you have debt you’ve paid off? Have you bought something like a cottage, boat, or new bicycle? Write it down. Describe it.
- Community: Who’s in your life? What qualities do they have that are important to you? How do these people make you feel?
- Legacy: What legacy are you working on leaving? Are you a contributor to your community and if so, how? What might that look like? What causes are important to you? What impact do you want to have? Again, you don’t need to know the specifics of what this is, but describe what it could look like.
- Family and Pets: Are you raising kids or pets? What’s important about that to you? If kids, what qualities do you strive to teach or influence them to have? If pets, what kinds do you have and how many?
- Work-Life Balance: What else is important to you? Perhaps family time, social time, and having a good work-life balance (whatever that means to you)?
- Big Goals: Do you dream of accomplishing any big goals? Running a marathon? Writing a book? Winning an award in your industry? Performing in a play? Write it down, no matter how big or crazy it seems right now. You have time to figure it out.
Now that you’ve got your list, spend the next week writing these 10 Feels down every day and see how they—you guessed it—feel. Are they inspiring? Are some of them too conservative because you’re scared someone might read them? If that’s the case, too bad—these are your dreams, and I want you to go BIG. So, scrap the conservative ones and write the scary, audacious ones down. I want you to feel uncomfortable with these—dreams are meant to seem slightly unattainable. That’s half the fun.
I started doing this exercise in 2020 writing down the ten dreams I wanted by 2030.
Here are a few of those dreams I wrote down, some have come true and some continue to be a work in progress:
- I am a successful entrepreneur who helps others live happier, healthier, and more fulfilling dreams.
- Chris and I have an exceptional marriage and enjoy each other’s company.
- Our boys are kind, funny, smart, happy, healthy, authentic, and pursue their passions.
- I have a strong, loving, open relationship with my sons.
- I am happy, healthy and fulfilled.
At the time I wrote these goals, I had no clue how some of them would happen. I just knew I wanted them and had 10 years to figure it out. However, by focusing on my dreams, opportunities started to present themselves to me that I may not have seen before. Opportunities like becoming a Transformational Coach through an online ad. Or the opportunity to go on a mother-son trip to Yellowstone National Park, which I may have previously said no to because I thought it was too expensive, but which was the perfect opportunity to unplug and bond with my eldest son, creating lasting memories. Vision, and focusing on the what, not the how, got me there.
Once your list feels good, write it out every single day. Yes. Every. Single. Day. Why? Because you are feeding your subconscious. And what does that do? It helps you to manifest them. There is a belief that what you put out into the universe can come back to you, also known as the law of attraction. So, put it out there, let it excite you, and see what opportunities come your way.
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